When I started to take this blog seriously, I decided I wanted to use it as a way to inspire. I wanted to make people laugh, maybe pass the blog to their friends and say "read what this kid said". I also wanted to inspire the writer in myself. I wanted to give me a way to take my life and put a fun twist on it whether people got the joke or completely missed it. The one thing I never wanted to do is post "woe is me" type entries. When I first started the blog almost two years ago it was a very "personal" and sometimes whiny blog. Which is why I stopped writing it. It's very easy for what I want to talk about to come off as whiny but I promise that I'm trying my best to just look at things from the most honest and sincere perspective possible. The fact is I'm actually really upset and a little angry about what I'm about to write about and writing is my therapy.
Tonight some friends and I went to a play in Philadelphia. We had a really good time and went out for drinks afterwards with the writer/director. When we returned to the parking lot i discovered that my car window was busted open. With further inspection we discovered that my CD player, my iPod, my GPS, my wallet (no bank cards or money in it though, just a driving license) and about $100 worth of Comics were stolen. Furthermore they clearly attempted to hot-wire the car. When that was unsuccessful they throw my trash around inside the car. Upon returning home I posted this on twitter "To the dick who busted my car window and stole my CD player & My iPod. Fuck you! I had to listen to the radio driving home asshole!"
I feel like while this is an insincere expression of anger, I wanted to make light of the situation. The fact is I did and have remained calm over this. Half of me wants to cry and the other half of me is extremely angry. Luckily I was born with a 3rd half (or an inability to understand fractions and other simple math problems) which understood something. All that really happened to me was that i was inconvenienced and lost some stuff, and nothing important. My GPS sucks because I use it alot, my CD player I use alot too... but I bought it in 2004 for $30, the iPod well... it sucks since it was new... but it's just an iPod, even the months worth of comics I'd just picked up... it sucks but it's just stuff. The window sucks too, but I still HAVE a car. I'm refusing to let this put a dent in my "moving to LA" plans.
Why am I awake at 3am right now writing this blog? Is it really for anyone other then me? I don't want your sympathy or comments saying "sorry Matt to hear about this" or people telling me what to do or even compliments like "you're handling this so well"... the fact is I want to remind people that sometimes life sucks. Part of the reason I was upset/angry was because I felt like this was a personal attack. I found myself thinking "Why Me? What did I do wrong?" but the fact is... I just lost some money in life's game of poker. The plus is that this is a really long game of poker, and I'm not completely broke yet and chances are I can start winning again. I still have a car that can get me to work so I can save money for the move (and perhaps to fix the window) and more importantly the friends who love me, family that loves me even more.
Thanks to the readers of this blog, the people who love me, and to the people who helped me remember to always keep my head up. I attribute my look on life to my grandfather who died years ago. One of my first entries was about the incredible impact he had on my life. This was one of his favorite songs and it's a song that always reminds me to keep my head up. To my grandpop, I dedicate this song to you. To the person who broke into my car, fuck you... but thank you... for reminding me there's more important things in my life than just stuff
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
It was time for that wallet, anyway! ;) hang in there!
ReplyDeleteMatthew 6:19 "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
ReplyDeleteEverything fades in time except what's in our hearts and souls. If I my body fails, my family and friends wrong me, my job is unsatisfying, and I am all alone, I still have hope, faith, and love and trust that this world is only temporary and heaven is forever.
I know this may be deep, but I think it needs to be said. Despite our heart aches, various tragedies and trials, and overall overwhelming occurrences throughout life, we can't let go of our faith in another place. Each day that passes is just another day closer.
That indeed was inspiring.
ReplyDeleteYou've acquired a new reader! :)