There's been some updates and changes in the final month of Matt Kelly. For starters I am no longer driving to LA. July 3rd a car carrier will be picking up my car and transporting it to Los Angeles. July 6th I will fly out to LA.
Anyway, last night my friends Lauralie, Mark, Ed, Shrop and Graham took me out to Carraba's for dinner. Based on our mutual love of How I met Your Mother we all suited up. Afterwards we went back to Lauralie's house where she muppetized the house. We played Cranium and Things and ate MupCakes.
Thankfully someone took pictures so I'll post them all up here.
SUMMARY
"There's Not a Word Yet, For Old Friends Who Just Met". If there's anything that the last month has taught me, it's this. I'm a very blessed person. I have a strong core circle of friends who are sincerely going to miss me. They've turned this month into multiple farewell parties to let me know that they love me. I'm excited to go to LA and I'm excited to make new friends, but I know deep down I'm never going to find friends like the ones I have out here. As we near the final week, the mixture of fear, excitement and sadness has come to a full boil.
It's been a while since I've updated but there's not much that's been going on. I've been hanging out with people and watching TV but until last night there wasn't any major "EVENTS".
Last Night was the Saint Mort Farewell Concert. Since 2004 I had been throwing concerts for different charities. So as a going away 'party' I tried to get a bunch of old bands to reunite. In the end we got 3 bands to reunite (Nitty Gritty, The Uninspired and Proven Worth), also on the show was my brother's friends band Beast Mode On, Reggae/Ska/Rock/Punk band Roots in Stereo, Pop-Punk/Rapper Team Goldie and Finally me.
Kevin (The Drummer of Proven Worth and Co-Promoter) and I arrived at 3pm to set up the show. We finally had everything set up just in time (6pm) for the show to start. Sadly there were 3 people that weren't in bands that were there. The First Band Beast-Mode On played a short and bizarre set full of rapping, dancing, random breakdowns and finally playing Kiss From a Rose by Seal over the stereo while they simply sat on the ground singing along.
Next Up was Nitty Gritty who completely destroyed. Those not familar with Gritty they are a Ha-Ha Hip Hop group with such songs like "Filling Up My Socks" (about jerking off into socks), Taste These Tots (about getting your balls licked) and Hittin' Bitches in the Face With Pans (which is self explaintory). By the time they were done the numbers grew to about 30 people.
The Uninspired went on stage next. They were a ska band that broke up about 2 years ago. They did a fun set that everyone seemed to enjoy. After their set while Andrew Emsley was setting up Frank (the owner) pulled me to the side and informed me 'There's not enough people here. Wrap up the Show by 9pm or Pay me for Security'. Originally the show was going to end at 10. He told us this at 7:45 and we had 5 acts to go. I told Andrew to play 3 songs while we figured it out. Finally I decided to cut myself off the line up and give the other 3 acts 20 minutes a piece. Andrew did his 3 songs and then Roots in Stereo immediately played their set. Amazing band if you haven't heard them and I highly recommend looking for them.
After them Fan Favorite Team Goldie performed. He closed his set with Sharpshooter! Sharpshooter! which is a song about when he lived in California and was driving back to PA. The Chorus is simply 'You can't Spell Home Without Pennsylvania!" He brought out a second microphone and invited me to do a duet with him. It was a blast.
FInally Proven Worth set up for their performance. Kevin pulled me on stage and started to give a speech about how I used to book shows and did them for charity. While I don't agree with him he referred to me as the most important person in the local music scene. After the speech he presented me with a brand new guitar that everyone signed.
It was then that it was announced on the insistence of Andrew Emsley anyone who wanted to could meet us in Library Parking Lot at 10 and I'd perform a set on the new acoustic. Proven Worth played a quit set of fan favorites and closed on a performance of Lit's My Own Worst Enemy that had the entire crowd singing along.
We quickly packed up and drove to the Library where I played about 45 minutes. Telling stories and joking around. The Highlight for me was covering Rebecca black's Friday with Team Goldie doing the rap. Apparently some people were able to tape it so hopefully those videos will be up soon.
SUMMARY
Sometimes when things seem like their worst, they're not so bad. Making the decision to cut myself from the show wasn't an easy one. I was extremely excited to play one last show for my friends. After deciding to not play so the other bands could I was extremely depressed. I had to fight back tears. However the outpouring of love from friends and bands. The fact that about 30 people came to a parking lot at 10 at night to see me sing some silly songs and hear stories was much better. I had more fun and it was much more touching than if I had just played last at the venue.
Sometimes you don't know the impact you have on people. I never did Chords for a Cure to be noticed. For the first few years the only people who knew i was throwing the show were close friends and the bands I booked. I never considered myself important. I just booked the bands I wanted to hear. I never thought it'd make an impact on anyway. I can't help but think about the slogan for Chords for a Cure... Changing the World one show at a time. People sometimes talk to me about what I do and I'll never understand why people are amazed I do the charity work I did. I think every person is capable of changing the world. So today let's take the old Chords Slogan and alter it just slightly.
In my on going quest to hang out with people one last time before I moved I spent the day with Lauralie, her husband Mark and her daughter Chase (to read more about Lauralie's life with chase I suggest her humorous blog). What we planned was a day full of chinese food and rom/com's/Teen Flicks.
We watched four flicks in total. Whatever it Takes, 10 Things I hate About You, Eight Days a Week & The Wedding SInger. Whatever it Takes and Eight Days A Week I'm not going to talk about at this time because both of them will appear in upcoming That One Guy columns. Furthermore there's not much to say about 10 Things I Hate About You besides the fact that it's the 2nd best 90's teen flick (just slightly behind Can't Hardly Wait). What I wanted to focus on is the Adam Sandler/Drew Barrymore rom-com The Wedding SInger.
At the time The Wedding Singer was released Adam Sandler was my favorite actor. I had probably watched Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore literally 100 times and memorized every single line. But regardless of this, I wasn't excited about The Wedding Singer, the commercials didn't make me laugh too much and I didn't really know anything about the 80's to feel like I'd "get it". Regardless it starred Adam Sandler and so thusly I saw it. I remember leaving the theater in love with this movie. The jokes worked the plot was nice and simplistic and the soundtrack introduced me into the wonderful world of 80's music. Even in 7th grade I knew that while it wasn't his funniest movie, it was his best. It was with this movie I developed a crush on Drew Barrymore.
My crush with Drew Barrymore was pretty serious. She was the first celebrity I ever actively tracked down nude photographs of on the internet. It was of course 1998 and I was in 7th grade, so not only was this the peak of my puberty and sexual discovery (without actually having sex or even a girlfriend) but it was also the days of dial-up internet meaning that I actually had to take time to wait for images to slowly load before my eyes.
My friends never liked the movie to the level I did. I saw it a second time in theaters, bought the VHS and watched it on a weekly basis. I even recall watching it at a birthday sleep-over with my 3 best friends at the time along with The Frightners, Nightmare on Elm Street and Starship Troopers. As I look back throughout my life, I feel like The Wedding Singer almost became the template for my 'ideal' relationship. Which may also explain why I always seem to fall for girls who are dating complete assholes. Even my last entry I basically quoted Robby Hart (adam sandler) on why I want to write 'so that someone will go, wow, i know what that guy was feeling when he wrote that'. The Soundtrack even introduced me to some of my all time favorite songs, I remember listening to Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic and wishing I had a girl that made me feel the way that Sting felt.
The film is probably also one of the defining films of Lauralie and I's friendship (along with 10 Things and Empire Records). We watched this movie on a semi-yearly rate and it had gotten to a point where I almost couldn't watch the movie alone unless I texted Lauralie first to see if she wanted to watch it with me. Every time we watched this movie it seems like we decided we wanted to throw yet another 80's party. But this got me thinking about the 80's; all things considered the music and select movies (mostly horror and John Hughes) were the highlights, most of the people were pretty shitty and self-absorbed (the 2000's were basically the 80's part 2) and the clothes were pretty awful. Right now I'm watching American Graffiti, now the 50's is a decade I'd have loved to lived in. Of all the 'cliches' in the world, I can relate to Greasers more than anyone, or at least I understand the idea of it. I will never be a Greaser. I don't care about cars, I enjoy rock-a-billy but I'm hardly what I'd call a fan and I am too lazy to do anything with my hair. But I get why people are Greasers. I don't understand most other things. I don't get Juggalos or Goths or Kids with Mohawks (and for most of high school I listened to exclusively punk/ska) but I get wishing you could live out the 50s. Burger Shops, Drive-Ins, Sock-Hops, Rock-N-Roll. It's all so appealing, that being said, if I'm anyone in this movie... I'd have been Toad and he's basically the Anti-Greaser.
Summary
I spend a lot of time thinking of "What Ifs". I wonder about if I'd made moves sooner or if I had waited. I wonder about what happens if I move away this or that happens. I wonder about if I die early and while I think it's normal, it's not healthy. There's a quote that's frequently attributed to John Lennon (although I think I heard it was basically a paraphrase from someone else but regardless) 'Life is what happens while you're making plans'. If you don't live for the now, you're not living at all. If I'm going to die young there's nothing I can do about it, just hope that at the end of the day people will say "Here lies Matt Kelly, he lived his life to the fullest."
Today I was driving with Ed in the car. We just finished seeing X-men: First Class (I liked it quite a bit, I rank it above X-men but Below X2). We began talking about music and how we sometimes connect songs with people (me) and sometimes we don't (Ed). The conversation was brief but we also covered how no one has made an "important" album in a long time. I'm attempting to think of an example of the last important album I bought, but it keeps making me question "important". I'd say for me the last important and impactful albums I bought were The Format: Dog Problems, Norah Jones: Come Away With me and the Streets: Original Pirate Material. But those are important to me, not the grander pictures (except maybe Norah Jones since that album swept the Grammy's in 2001). I think importance is hard to define or label until a decade later, a decade ago I was a high school freshman so I'm still too young to know if anything i listened to in High School is 'Important".
Anyway, this idea of music representing a moment in time stuck with me. I struggle to separate the song from the moment. Example; my freshmen year of college I had a small mp3 player. It only held about 100megs of music which is roughly 5 songs more than a blank CD. Do to the small memory and my lack of a desire to change up the MP3 player everyday, I heard the same 20 songs ALOT. Because of this whenever I hear the song "Les Wirth" by twothirtyeight I immediately think of my drive home from college (specifically train tracks on lenni road which I almost always seemed to be crossing when the song came on). Furthermore whenever I cross over those train-tracks I'm reminded of the song. I always remember what bands a person showed me and forever connect that band to that person.
In Ed's car we were listening to The Rocket Summer: Hello, Good Friend. This album always makes me think of Shrop who played it for me in his car one night driving to the local late night diner. I became obsessed with the song Brat Pack. At the time we were attempting to write a teen flick (about what I can't remember) and I convinced myself this song would be the ideal opening credits song. In retrospect this was the biggest problem with Shrop and I's movie writing techniques. We were always more focused on a shot idea, a specific line of dialogue or musical cue instead of actual plots. However while listening to this album in Ed's car I wasn't thinking of Shrop specifically; but I was thinking about how much this album makes me think of California. This would be for two reasons.
1. When I flew out to California last summer I drove down to Baltimore instead of flying out from Philly. The reason I did this was because a flight out of Baltimore was $50 cheaper than from Philly and I had a friend who lived in the area who I figured I could leave my car with for the week. This plan fell apart however when my returning flight wouldn't land until almost midnight and she had work at 5am. So in order to save $50 I ended up spending $100 in parking and at least $40 in gas. I never was good at Math. Anyway, during my drive home after a good week in california I listened to this album. I focused on every lyric and thought about how it expressed my desire to move away, but also my fear of leaving my comfort zones
2. I still feel this way when I hear this album. The problem is except random lyrics here and there throughout the album, I don't think anyone else I know would listen to this album and go "wow this is making me think about Matt Kelly moving away". If there is any album my friends would listen to that would possibly make them think about me moving it would be Less Than Jake's Hello Rockview which is a ska/punk album all about choosing between dreams or being stuck in a boring town. That being said, I'm pretty sure Gainsville, Florida is more exciting than my hometown.
Currently I'm watching Rocky Horror Picture Show and it's making me think of my last girlfriend. She was obsessed with this movie; I was a huge fan of the movie myself. I use was because this is the first time I'm actually sitting down and watching it from start to finish since the break up three years ago. At the time of the break-up I thought this movie would be ruined forever. For a while I was correct. However right now I'm enjoying it. It still makes me think of the ex and it probably always will... but at least I don't feel a strong desire to cry like I would have two and a half years ago.
SUMMARY
I think it's completely healthy to sometimes connect music with people, places and events. It's part of what music is for. Sometimes I question why I bother writing a blog and why I want to write movie scripts and I think it's because of Chuck Klosterman. Today I reread all of Killing Yourself To Live and it dawned on me. Chuck's writing and most blogging is roughly the same. Klosterman is an insanely talented writer and brilliant mind but the reason I (and I'd like to believe most people) read his books and essays aren't so much to enlighten me or teach me something new but more so to validify my normalcy. When I read his opinion is the same as mine... I feel good. I feel like I have validation for my liking or disliking sometime. Sort of like why I defend my love of the Marx Brother's comedy classic Duck Soup because Woody Allen's character in Hannah and Her Sisters decides not to commit suicide after watching it. Ridiculous yes, but still the fact a fictional character didn't take his life in a movie because he enjoyed a movie I also enjoyed makes me feel happy. Same goes with when Chuck Klosterman defends Weezer's entire Post-Pinkerton discography, it makes me feel better about loving Raditude. But it's not just his opinions that are comforting, reading about someone else having the same relationship issues as I do makes me feel less lonely. I've always tried to write things to make others go 'I feel the same way' or 'I know what this guy was going through'. When I'm writing scripts, music plays such a key role in that. Not only do I connect music with people places and events of my past. I connect them to future events that I create in my head. That however... maybe a serious issue worth talking to a therapist about.
After finishing all of the Star Wars Trilogy, Ed decided it was time for me to see the Step Up Trilogy. We however skipped Step Up 1 based on him telling me "The dancing isn't as awesome and it's kinda boring". I was reluctant as we put in Step Up 2: The Streets... but in the first two minutes I saw this!
Fucking incredible! The movie is complete garbage in the realm of plot and acting but the dancing is incredible! It was around this time we got a phone call from Sean and Stacie informing us that they were near so we met up at the pizza place for lunch. I was a little upset because they were only going to be spending the night and then leaving early the next afternoon. We watched some more movies, grilled burgers for dinner and then Shrop arrived.
It was by this point I had a monstrous headache to the point of dizziness but I had to stay awake till Jackie and Pete arrived. As soon as they arrived I went to bed.
June 4th
I woke up and we intended on going to the local water park as soon as George, Lauren and Alyce to arrive. However it was incredibly cold and rainy so that didn't happen. There was a flea market nearby though so we met up with the three of them there. I dropped a few bucks on some Marvel Trading Cards and WWF Cards (both circa 1995) as well as a bunch of old Garbage Pail Kids cards. We then went to the store with Jackie to buy chicken and pasta while everyone else went to the mountain house. When I arrived back the entire house was directed hollywood theme and I was told that Stacie and Sean weren't actually leaving. Hanging in the middle of the living room was a giant "Follow Your Dreams Matt" Banner.
We started cooking burgers for lunch and playing Just Dance on the wii. Shrop and I drove to the nearby "Used Book Store" and I ended up dropping about $20 on 7 books. When I returned we started cooking dinner "Chicken Alfredo and Corn on the Cob". We sat outside to eat and at the end of the meal Sean walked out wearing with a cake for me and they all had shirts made up for me (each one of them was wearing the shirt under their hood). It was without a doubt the nicest thing anyone has done for me.
Finally we sat down to play board games. It was around this time they revealed a DVD that they're finishing up for me called "How I Met Matt Kelly". It was all them telling stories of hanging out, the first time they met me, photographs, videos, it was funny and heartwarming. I'm excited to final get a copy of the final DVD.
The next day we drove home
SUMMARY
In my life I've learned that no matter what, your friends will always be there. We constantly focus on the importance of Family, but friends are just as important if not more so. It blows my mind to reflect on how each one of my friends became a part of my life, it's such a long web of "this had to happen" then "this had to happen" etc, etc. Someone like Shrop I literally had 3 different oppurtunities to be friends with before we actually became best friends.
I'm saddened that 4 of my other close friends couldn't be there. Some because of work, some because they live in Japan and some because of well me. I wish those four people could have been there, but there's still 30 more days to see them (except the one in Japan, for Crystal... there's always skype). It took the goodbye from my friends to finally make me ready to make this trip happen. I feel loved but more importantly i feel confident. I feel a confidence you can only receive from the best of friends and I hope that each one of my friends while planning a vacation in the future... thinks Los Angeles.
Last Night I had my first ever Panic Attack. I became convinced that no matter what I did I was going to die this weekend and if I didn't than LA would be terrible and I'd starve to death and die alone. This can only be attributed to the fact that I officially paid the deposit on my apartment in LA and am now freaking out. It wasn't until I splashed water on my face and took some deep breaths that I was able to calm down enough to sleep.
I finished reading the book "Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time" which started off quite fascinating but then sort of over stayed it welcome a few chapters. I still highly recommend the book. It's written from the perspective of a 15 year old who has what could be either autism or aspergers. Throughout the book he tries to solve the mystery of who murdered his next door neighbor's poodle.
I started rewatching Arrested Development (Jesus Michael Cera had so much baby fat that first season) and then I picked up Ed and drove up to the mountain house to have a star wars marathon. This only lasted A New Hope and 32 minutes into Empire Strikes Back until Ed fell asleep. I will eventually post photos of the weekend.
SUMMARY
It seems that no matter what is stressing you, it seems like you have to take a breath and relax. Life is hard and sometimes it feels like settling is the easiest option, but it's always the option that will make you the least happy. My options are follow my dream in LA and risk failure; or find a new job in PA and fail automatically. I worry about not finding love, or happiness. I grow concerned that if I move someone I love will die suddenly before i can say goodbye. But if I stayed in PA I'd risk those exact same things. The only difference is location. If it doesn't work and I'm unhappy... I can come home... but I can't come home, unless I leave first. People ask me why I'm doing this, specifically since I keep getting so scared about it, but the answer is obvious... I'm doing it for me.
This is the first volume of the "Matt Kelly's Last Month in PA" section of my blog. Each entry will keep you up to date with what I'm doing with my last month in my hometown before moving 3,000 miles away. Based on the fact that my favorite shows are things like Scrubs and How I met Your Mother each entry will end with a "summary" and have a song to accompany it.
June 1st The other night I found myself watching my High School Senior Memory Tape. For so long I hated high school and I'm still not a fan of it, but whenever I watch that video I'm reminded that it wasn't all bad.
I'm still dealing with writer's lazy. I have ideas but I can't get motivated to write anything besides my articles and blog entries.
I finally found a place to live with my friend and future roommate Brian Walton. Tomorrow I send him our deposit and first month's rent.
I also watched Mr. Show Seasons 1&2, Home Movies Season 2 and South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut. The all remind me of the type of quality comedy product I hope to one day release.
Tonight I'm going to Quizzo with Sarah and her husband Will and possibly my friend Caitlin from DE; Tomorrow afternoon I'm going to the mountains for the weekend.
SUMMARY: (accompanied by Ben Fold's Still fighting It)
It seems to me in retrospect; high school wasn't terrible. I made friends with plenty of people and while only a handful I talk to on a semi-regular basis it was worth it. I worked in the TV studio, learned how to edit and in Senior Variety Show I got to enjoy people laughing at jokes I had written. It'd be amazing to think that one day I'll be working on a show like Mr. Show and people I graduated going 'Wow, remember when we went to school with Matt Kelly and he did that Chemistry rap?!" A lot of people want to be famous to 'rub their classmates face in it' as an 'told you so' aspect. But for me I just want to make people go "wow I remember him."
It's impossible to succeed in these goals if I don't get my shit together and write some scripts. But at least I'm moving to the original Dream Factory Los Angeles. I'm frankly terrified about this movie, but once I have a job I'll be much more relaxed about it. I know people don't think it but... I do love my friends and family. I'm going to miss them terribly and every morning I wake up thinking about canceling this move so that I don't have to leave them. However now that a deposit has been placed, backing out is no longer an option.
