Merry Mattmas

It's been almost 10 days since my last blog entry; a lot has happened which I'll be covering throughout the next few weeks; You can look forward to the following soon:

- a report on my trip to New York Comic Con
- The final episode of Undercover Geek
- Various other videos

I'd also wish to announce here that do to various things (most i don't want to get too in depth with) I will not be moving to Los Angeles until Early July (thinking July 6th-ish) so PA gets an extra 6 months of me.

But the important thing is that this past weekend i celebrated the 25th anniversary of my daring escape from my mother's uterus. It feels awkward being a quarter of a century old. The Birthday was a nice one; spent Thursday with my immediate family at Texas Roadhouse; My mom's family came over Friday night for pizza and cake and then Saturday I had friends over (it was mostly just hanging out watching How I met Your Mother and talking).

Sorry that after 10 days it's such a small entry but I'm dogsitting with limited wireless so I can't really focus on what I want to say.

Old School Power Down - I'm Stealing my Kisses Back

This Month's Old School Power Down was a short film (50 seconds) that I made with Matt Howard of Racing Kites, My best friend Jeff Shropshire and a friend from school. It was created by Shrop and shot/edited by myself. There's a lot of funny stories behind this short and I forgot to say them all. But here's the cliff notes version:

- Idea stemmed from watching Scrubs
- We didn't tell Alyce about the second half of the video; we just shot her scenes and then shot the rest after she left
- We edited the entire video during a 15 minute drive from Penn State to our friend Ed's house
- Alyce requested we take the video down after the video was the number one thing that came up when you googled her
- That was a year or two ago and her name is nowhere around the video now
- Her and I are still friends for some reason

Human CentiTweet

Since the first second that i saw the trailer for Human Centipede: First Sequence I had been overcome with interest. I knew that chances were this movie was going to be terrible and disturbing; but the John Waters/Troma fan in me desperately wanted to see what this film could dish out. I decided to watch the movie and tweet about it; I creatively called it Human CentiTweet. Here's the results:

0:00 - #HumanCentiTweet Begins!
2 Minutes - aww he misses his doggie centipede
5 Minutes - oh man these bitches are annoying; someone sew an ass to their mouths to shut them the fuck up
7 Minutes - "There's no Signal" "There's Always a signal" "well not here in the middle of nowhere!"
8 MInutes - "You're always wet between your legs" This has "Best original Screenplay" locked easily
12 Minutes - "Is that a house? I think it's a house!"
15 Minutes - Dear Future LA roomates: I require a giant wall sized painting of Conjoined Twins in my house
20 Minutes - Oh shit! They're waking up tied to beds; shits about to go down motherfucker!
25 MInutes - DRAWING OF A BUTTHOLE! THERE WAS A DRAWING OF A BUTTHOLE!
27 Minutes - Just for the record, if given the option always choose to be the front of the human centipede... just saying
28 MInutes - Last tweet doesn't apply to those who get off on eating shit
35 Minutes - Punishment of being the middle of the Human Centipede... now that's a fucking punishment
41 Minutes - Man I hope he doesn't fuck up cutting on those blue lines could be really hazardous
42 Minutes - HE'S CUTTING INTO HER BUTT! THIS MOVIE IS AMAZING!
45 Minutes - Ladies and Gentleman we have a #HumanCentiTweet and it's glorious
48 MInutes - why is the guy in the front crying? He's just getting an eternal rimjob
50 Minutes - WW2 has taught us, a happy German is a dangerous German
51 MInutes - he's making it fetch the paper and ndow he's riding it. I mean really what do you do when you have a #HumanCentiTweet
65 Minutes - Constipation the worst thing that could happen to your human centipede
75 Minutes - They're very slowly getting away!
78 MInutes - Oh no! Not the front of the Centipede!
86 MInutes - This movie was fucking nuts! Thus ends #HumanCentiTweet

So what's the final verdict on this truly bizarre movie? Well it's not as scarring as I expected; it's not the most disgusting, or offensive or crude movie I've ever seen. The concept works but the movie doesn't seem to know what it wants to be. I think this movie probably works better with a group of friends and probably some drinks, but alone in a basement it just is awkward. The overacting mad scientist is the true star of the movie though. It's worth a watch but I don't forsee it having much rewatchability. Three Stars out of a Possible 5